Thursday, May 6, 2010

Metro What?!?

I heard a term the other day, "metrosexual." Having nary a clue as to what it meant, I asked. The answer I got was a bit disturbing. Why? Why would any self respecting man act like a woman? And no, I'm not a sexist. And no, I'm not a homophobe (the suffix 'phobe' implies fear and I fear no one; I just don't like them).

Men should act like men and women should act like women. What in the hell is wrong with that?!? A man... getting a manicure? A man getting a pedicure? A man doing any number of things that I heard about in this conversation... WHAT THE HELL?!?


Color me dumfounded but, I just can not understand the thinking behind this.

Real men do not get manicures. You've got clippers, use them.
Real men do not get pedicures. See above. If, due to a well-earned beer-gut, you can't reach your toes, ask your wife to get them for you.
Real men do not get facials. It's called soap. It comes in bars and even liquid form now. Use it.
Real men do not drink fruity-alcoholic beverages. It's called Scotch, drink it.
Real men do not hang out with a bunch of women discussing where the best place to buy shoes is. Your place is at the bar, discussing baseball, golf, guns and women.
Real men do not drive a Prius. It's called a Jeep or a truck. Drive one.
Real men do not own 20 pairs of shoes. All you need is a pair of boots, Sunday shoes and sneakers. Wear them.
Real men do not eat quiche. It's called huevos rancheros with jalepenos you freakin' sissy.


And people wonder what's wrong with this country.

Dads of the world, unite! Take back your sons and show them the proper way to be a real man. A real American man and not some girly-mouthed, sissy-pants.

1 comment:

  1. And real men don't take any crap from liberals!